Nov 8, 2018

We are continuing our focus in Season 3 on preparing ourselves for the holidays. However, the stress triggers we’ll address in this episode and the secret to addressing them are relevant  anytime of year. Most of the stress we feel at this time of year can be traced to one (or some combination) of four common causes. The bad news is that these situations are very difficult to avoid encountering any time of the year, but especially during the holidays.

The good news is you don’t have to avoid them in order to navigate them well and not let these circumstances create stress for you. Be sure and get your copy of the step-by-step guide to implementing the secret I’m teaching you in the podcast.

Discoveries Awaiting You in This Episode:

  • Whether you eagerly anticipate the holidays or dread them, your stress level and to do list probably increases these last couple months of the year. [1:15]

4 Common Causes of Stress and Suffering

These four are year-round culprits but tend to amp up their game during the holidays.

 

Change

  • Change (good or bad) is our first trigger. I address three types of change that can induce stress during the season. [3:10]
  • The first type of stress-inducing change we look at is change in our routines and schedules. Travel, work and school routines are just some of the things that are altered by the holiday season. [3:34]
  • Being around different people than we normally interact with can also prompt some stress. Extended family or long-lost friends are often part of our holiday plans. And even if we aren’t around different people than we see daily, we may be interacting with our regular people in different ways. (Holiday office parties or school class parties, for example). [4:50]
  • Our to do list and regular responsibilities get an influx of new activities and tasks. Even if we don’t say yes to all the added requests, just the presence of added requests can drive the people-pleaser within us up a wall with guilt and overwhelm. [5:50]

Expectations

  • The second common cause of holiday stress is expectations. We pile expectations on ourselves and on others and most of the time we are not even aware we are doing so.  [7:52]
  • When reality clashes with expectations conflict, angst, and even anger or sadness can be the joy-wrecking result. [8:50]
  • Be aware of the operating manual that you have for the other people and the events in your life. You know, that 3 inch thick list of expectations we have (albeit unconsciously) about how the people in our lives are supposed to behave in order to make us happy. [9:01]
  • Whenever we compare ourselves with others, we put expectations on ourselves—even if we are completely oblivious that we are playing the comparison game. Whenever you put your backstage life up against another person’s front stage life and compare as if you are comparing apples to apples, you will feel like you come up short. Social media is the perfect venue for unwittingly playing a comparison game that leaves you feeling like you don’t measure up if you are are scrolling your feed unaware of your thinking. [9:27]

Relationships

  • The third common stress trigger that amps up during the holidays is relationships. Who will you be getting together with this holiday season? Is there someone that you will be around who just gets on your last nerve or pushes your buttons? That can be a huge source of stress and suffering during the holiday season. But don’t worry, the secret I’m sharing with you in this episode will equip you to glide through the holiday interactions with challenging relationships with grace and ease.[11:10]

Reminders of Loss

  • The fourth trigger we encounter during the holidays is the reminder of loss. Whether we’ve lost a loved one, a relationship, a job or any number of other significant losses, the holidays can have a tendency to amplify our grief. [12:59]

The Secret to Managing the 4 Common Causes of Stress

  • So what’s the secret to navigating change, expectations, relationships, and reminders of loss? Well it does not rely on changing or avoiding our circumstances.That’s great news! [14:05]
  • Discover what actually produces our misery and discomfort. God has given you complete authority over all you need to radically change your experience of your circumstances.[14:48]
  • I’ve got a self-coaching tool to help you exercise this authority and navigate change, expectations, your relationships, and your losses like a boss! Click here to get this step-by-step guide.
  • And If you want some personal, one-on-one coaching to help you plan for and navigate your specific stress or suffering-inducing circumstances, click here to learn more about coaching with me.

Handle All These Stress Triggers Like a Boss

Use this interactive step-by-step guide to discover the root cause to any problem you face. When you use the Self-Coaching Model you’ll increase awareness of how your thoughts about your circumstances are the real culprits for your stress, guilt, misery or suffering.

When you manage your mind, you solve your problems without having to lift a finger to change your circumstances. Imagine how differently you’ll navigate the holiday stressors when you exercise your God-given authority over your thinking about them. You’ve got this! Click here and I’ll email you this detailed guide right away.

HELPFUL LINKS:

  • Brooke Castillo and The Life Coach School. Listen to Brooke explain The Self-Coaching Model in episodes #1, #17, #26, #72 of her podcast. And if you want more info on the concept of having a Manual for others, check out episode #11.
  • Click here to learn more about coaching with me. Discover what other clients have to say about their results and book a session so we can begin getting you your own amazing transformation.

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QUESTIONS OR COMMENTS?

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